Grace

I know this isn't a holiday hit, but it's what I need today.

We humans--me--I--this human, fumbles through life, feeling up at times, feeling down. Sometimes mitigating the suffering around me--able to find compassion. Other times I take that tone of judgement that Jackson Browne sings of, ignorant of who those around me are, what they experience. This is human. Every once in awhile I get a wake up call that announces I've been distracted, neglectful, self-absorbed. I understand that need for grace, for a personal savior who can lift me out of that--forgive me, hug me, send me on my way. I have the need, just not the belief. I get the kind of hope this season represents for so many. The darkness of winter isn't only literal. We're all looking for some of that amazing grace, some of us just have to look a little harder. How do I clean the slate, begin again (and again, and again, and again?)

I'm wearing pajamas to work today. The schoolwide Christmas sing-a-long is this morning, and dressing up makes the day fun for the kids. In the afternoon we're showing all 2nd grade the movie version of The Polar Express. This is my least favorite movie ever, to put it lightly. Its underlying message is that you must believe to receive not just Santa's magic, but also grace. I  hope my students will enjoy it and just have fun watching it, but I'll not try to impress them with any deeper message. I'll be there in my costume, putting on my happy face for the day and do what I can to be open to compassion, grace. I need a little of it myself, so maybe the getting is in the giving. Why not? Human kindness is overflowing, and I think it's gonna rain today.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BjQgN-PhBEU