Again?

We had a little birthday party for my youngest daughter yesterday. She's 12. My mom mentioned that it seems like it was just Christmas, and now she has to think about pulling that old tree out of its box. Again. Christmas time is here. Again. If the Beatles could sing that line just one more time, it might sink in.

We could say the same thing about every day, and maybe we do. It's morning. Again. Here I go to work. Again. Back on the yoga mat. Again. Sinkloads of crusty dishes, unmade beds, it seems we all share in Sisyphus' punishment. That is, if we choose to see life as punishment. I couldn't tell you how many times I've found myself in downward facing dog, the quintessential yoga posture. There are days when my down dogs are merely depots where I anticipate a more exciting train. The best days, though, are those where I really find myself in downward facing dog, not with a sense of "Oh, this again," but experiencing this familiar bodily shape with new eyes. Each time, whether I'm aware of it or not, I'm there with a new body, a renewed mind. It is in every way a new experience, and only an illusion that it's mere repetition.

The puncture wound in my hand is still healing. The skin has closed, leaving a pink scar. The muscle can bear a little more weight, flexion, and extension than it could before, but there's no way down dog will be the same old, same old this week. I can bear some weight on my hands, but I haven't tested supporting a full body load of it. I've stayed away from studio classes that are heavy on the sun salutations and arm balances, sadly, though I did get a little extra sleep and some early morning blog time. Yesterday I walked through some standing sequences in preparation for a class I was to teach and I'm ready to be back on the mat, even if it means walking instead of jumping up to my hands from down dog and seeking out alternatives to the handstands everyone else will be doing. The injury only makes obvious what is true every day: I practice yoga with a new body, with new awareness, always. Even two adho mukhas in the same session are not clones. Each one is an opportunity for inquiry and discovery of who I am. That's the beauty of it, eh?

So Christmas time IS here (and now) again. I'm a third of the way through this blog project and a little closer to seeing how I make my own meaning for this time of year and allow myself to celebrate it without hesitation. All holiday symbols that come to mind: the birth of Jesus, oil burning brighter and longer than it should, earth rounding that point where its axis points we folk in the northern hemisphere  toward sunlight--all these remind me to pay attention to the ways life is new in every second. Pay attention!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a4vE5DnFWV0